Good things happen in small spaces

Personally, I prefer a small home. Too much space overwhelms me--maybe because space breeds clutter, and houses things that I tend to keep but don't need. I feel I can keep a small space pretty and cozy and today, I found a couple of kindred souls.

Check out Tiny Homes, Big Ideas in Oprah.com. And though a little too extreme (even for me), Jay Shafer, founder of the Tumbleweed Tiny House Company, says living small is a luxury—and when he says living small, he means it. Jay's entire house is only 96 square feet! "It's the smallest house we've ever seen," Oprah says.

I think I can live in Jack Sammis's home. Check him out in his barely 7-foot wide Virginia flat, which Ripley's calls the narrowest home in America. It has a full-size bedroom and bathroom and lots of storage. The best part, though, is the garden. He can have 1 or 2 guests.

Designer Nate Berkus learned to prioritize after his most challenging make-over--a 250-foot Manhattan apartment. He utilized every inch of space to be functional. "I mean, how much space do we really need?" he says.

Speaking of Nate, check out his own 550-sq ft. New York City apartment make-over here.



I am so inspired at what you can do with small spaces. It sure beats a regular house with lots of space but with an unusable garage filled with things you don't even know about. You can't have guests over when your living room is filled with clutter and you technically have no storage space too, if your closets are busting out with clothes you haven't worn in years, and your dressers brimming with expired lotions and makeup.

My goal towards retirement is to keep downsizing and tossing away what I don't need instead of growing them into clutter. It feels freer, and the energy feels more positive. New things also have a way of coming into your life when your house is organized and clear.

The Best Burrito in town

After running my errands, I was walking to my car when a woman who pointed Taqueria Numero Uno out to her friend, saying, "They have the best burritos in town!" I tried it out for myself for lunch--and the woman was right!

The regular Carne Asada whole burrito (that I can't seem to ever finish by myself) measures about 8 inches long and about 4 inches wide, filled with marinated grilled and chopped steak, tomatoes, onion, cilantro, refried or whole beans, salsa, guacamole, sour cream and rice, in wholesale quantities, on a soft flour tortilla, all for $4.29. The steak is soft and full of flavor, the beas are tender but not mushy. Sometimes I like it with rice, no beans. On the side is their very own red or green hot sauce (not for novices!) I like this taqueria because of their lovely raspberry iced-tea (not to mention their exotic beer collection) to quench the edge away.

My husband and I like to sneak the burrito into the movies. When we have to share, we get the large burrito for $6.25--our dinner for 2. Somehow, these burritos taste better in the dark! We have tried the Carnitas (grilled shredded pork, like lechon kawali) and we still have to try the Pollo Asado (grilled chicken). I am loyal to the Carne Asada so I don't know when that will ever be. I don't think I will get around to the tacos (corn tortillas) and tostadas (deep fried flour tortillas)in the menu.

Lunchtime teems with Latino construction workers with paint on their overalls, along with the ladies who lunch. There are never any tourists here, only locals and Latinos at that. Dinnertime and week-ends coax the couples and families in.

Frugal Furniture Art

Well, what do you know? I thought I wouldn't have the time to paint anything. But I realized that the crazier my schedule is, the more I find time to "escape" and paint something. This is a $5 chair I bought from Salvation Army many months ago. It was a plain wooden chair.



After sanding and priming it, I painted it turquoise to match my batik-inspired Asian elephant.





I was ready to purchase a quart of paint for about $7 but when I looked at the "OOPS" section, where paint mixes were made in error, I found a turquoise shade that was very close to what I needed and bought the can for $1 (my favorite price!).



So the cost of the whole chair is $6. But working on it has given me invaluable solitude, peace and clarity of mind.

Chair: $6
Peace: priceless
And as the ad goes, "And for everything else, there's Master Card."

To Receive Graciously

One major part of starting over and migrating is the humility to accept gifts that I know I cannot reciprocate. When you are starting over, every gift is meaningful. Gifts given to us seem always bigger, more expensive. It takes a lot to accept that my Christmas gifts are simple, and not expensive.

Relatives and friends gave us hand-me downs for the kids that we really needed, specially for the winter. My mom and aunt gave me barely used pretty sweaters, jeans, coats. Generous grandparents and godparents gave the kids toys that we could never buy for them. My Chanel cousins showered us with the highest-end lipsticks and make-up gifts.

My friend gave me cash for my birthday. This is the first time anyone gave me cash (aside from my parents) for my birthday. Her husband thought it would offend me. But my friend reminded him of how deep our friendship was. There was a time in Manila that my friend was in financial stress. And there was time when she had poor, without a nice coat, in NYC herself. So she gives me money to buy myself a coat. I held the money in my hands and cried.

Out of joy, because my friend remembered my birthday, out of relief that I will retire my 10-year old coat, out of humility that I needed help to buy my own coat.

My husband needed a place to stay in LA and crashed with my cousins. We are a close-knit family and my cousins are like my brothers and sisters. I reminded him to bring something as a gift and he brought hopia and pastillas. He stayed with my cousins for 2 nights and when he returned home, my cousin sent my kids gifts: posters, new girly knap-sacks (which I knew she had to go out and buy as she had no daughters), and an Obaji skin-care kit for me!



I called my cousin and told her she didn't have to send those gifts as my husband crashed at her place and that was a big enough gift already. And she insisted that the kids enjoy the gifts

My friend, N and I discussed receiving gifts here in America, from cousins and friends that have hurdled the "starting over" phase. They now own their homes, their second homes, their many cars, and are in no way as financially tight as we are. (I suspect, though, that they went through worse times than I did. And I am thinking, where was I when they were struggling?)

Since we cannot give lavishly yet, we have to receive graciously. My friend said he felt worse when people gave him because it reminded him of how poor he was. (I don't!) Then he realized that the giving had nothing to do with him but had everything to do with the giver. Giving teaches the giver empathy. He has been there and he feels your "poorness." To allow the giver to give you in full glory is something we are both learning now.

"Simon helped Jesus carry the cross," said N. Jesus didn't have to let Simon help but he did. And now, all of Simon's descendants live good lives, according to the Bible. And we realized that the giving is also a gift for the giver, as his giving sets out a cycle of receiving more abundance.

Our conclusion? Be humble and gracious enough to receive. Be humble but not humiliated. B gracious and appreciative and don't think of reciprocating the gift. Don't say "Don't give me gifts anymore" as you are depriving them the glory to give. For then, you give the giver a sense of pride and allow good karma to fall upon him.

And when we can, we should always give, and it doesn't have to have a price tag on it. I specially like homemade gifts. My cousin said she sent me the gifts because I visited her son in the hospital after his surgery in San Francisco. And then she said something so wise: "Ate M, don't worry about my gifts, they are just bought with money."

I am so touched that she remembered that day when I got lost in the Muni on the way to the hospital, walked 2 whole uphill avenues, was under dressed for the weather, and thought I would be mugged!

Give, give, give and you shall receive. Receive with grace and think of the giver fondly. Your good wishes will actually do him well.